10.4.09

Free-flowing thoughts

It's been quite a week. Suck it up, kids, it's not going to be a normal post, but this is a place where I can freely write.

- I blew my ex this week. I made him come twice with one blowjob. Either I'm really fucking good or he's not getting it right. Following him on FB is odd, and I'm guessing that the message I just sent to him won't be good. Or maybe it will. He got to get off, and I didn't. Yes, his wedding is next month - good on him! - but I'd still like to finish what we started.

- I would have been able to fuck him had not another friend decided to stick around the entire time. I finally said, "You look spent, are you sure you don't want to pack it in?" He replied, "Are you trying to get rid of me?" I answered, "Yes." Still, he didn't leave. So for all of you guys who say that women don't tell you what they want, I say, "FUCK YOU."

- When I told one of my friends what I've done, I could hear her audibly inhale. Like I don't feel badly enough, because figuring out how to balance my life and my relationships against the traditional ones is hard. And for those of you who think that I'm just buying in to what's been to taught to all of us, I reiterate, "FUCK YOU."

- I am an incurable flirt. I so enjoyed this ex's company. I found it interesting that I didn't find him as physically attractive as I used to, but still, the chemistry was still there.

- He called it "electricity". That made me want him more.

OK, OK, I'll write the whole story soon.

I need butcher paper, two pieces, so I can create my tombstomb.

One last: While I was there, I almost called my ex by my Him's name. I think we know what this means.